Mindful Musing

“I am not what has happened to me, but what I choose to become”

Conventionally I see it as:

We become what we have chosen to do with what has happened to us.

Suffering is not from what has happened but what we do with it! There is an automatic subconscious interpretation of experience based on the need to meet unmet psychological needs that define our sense of self. This results in a creation of a self appropriate for the moment that dictates our action.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 17, 2026

Just Let It Be

Without me

by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 3, 2026

Is it the self that thinks the thoughts

Or is it the thinking mind that thinks the self

by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 20, 2026

Life is How We See It

We have the opportunity to see the value in each moment, rather than its negativity.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the magic of our HUMAN PROCESSING MIND that is able to create meaning and our reality in every experience.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate and learn about one’s CONDITIONED HISTORY that determines selfing.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the INTENTIONALITY and VALUE of how every created thought and feeling is an attempt to keep us safe, loved and worthy.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate what one can learn to EVOLVE along this contemplative path from our storied self to mindful presence.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the magic and mystery of being HUMAN as a sentient being.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate one’s innate GIFTS AND PASSIONS.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate feeling INTERCONNECTED and INTERDEPENDENT with everything.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the inevitability of DEATH to teach us to live each moment to its fullest.

Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the CHOICE one has in how you can act to be in a SKILLFUL relationship with what is present.

We need to intentionally reflect as often as we can, not whether the experience is good or bad in a judgmental sense but learn to recognize and appreciate the value in whatever is present. We need to change the lens through which we LOOK TO SEE. We create a predetermined way to look at experience every moment so that we see it as valuable, supportive, nourishing and enabling. In seeing the value in every moment we are less likely to be judgmental, be in resistance and act unskillfuly in reaction to it.

This is an intentionality that we need to start our day with and repeat as often as we can.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 6, 2026

Conventionally when we talk about ourselves it is from the first person perspective. It is from our personal point of view. We use “I, me, my, mine, we and our.” One can also describe what is happening from the third person perspective. In this scenario one is relinquishing ownership of the story to a witnessing perspective. One uses words such as “He, she, it, they, his, hers them or one’s name.” Using the third person perspective is an effective way to objectify the sense of self and support non-identification. What one is doing is stepping back and describing what is happening to this “person” that appears separate from you.

I lose my keys and am very angry. Conventionally my mind says: “I am so stupid and careless to have lost my keys. This is terrible. What will I do.” Describing it from the third person perspective I would say: “Philip lost his keys and now is feeling worried and upset.”

This initially feels quite strange to talk about yourself like this. Normally when we use someone’s first name we are talking about someone else.

Ethan Kross demonstrated that third person self-talk helped to facilitate self-control. Kross, E. Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI (2017). Scientific Reports Volume 7, Article number: 4519

It is a very simple effective technique using language to support mindfulness.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
February 20, 2026

Non-self-referential Labeling

In labeling one is trying to use an objective description of what is happing rather than a self-referential perspective. Describe what is noted without the use of the word I. In describing a sensation from the I perspective will only support reification of self and subsequent identification with it.

Label what is present by “NAMING IT”

This initial approach to labeling is to name the content, what is known. This can include several options. One could label the type of sensing, the sensation that is known in a general sense, the sensation that is known in a more specific sense, the interpretation of what is known and the reactive self-referential thoughts and emotions. Conventionally one might say: “I am hearing. I am hearing a sound. I am hearing the sound of a bird. I am hearing a pleasant sound of a bird. I am enjoying the sound.”

Preferably one would label in the following manner without the ownership of the sense of self: “Hearing. Hearing a sound. Hearing the sound of a bird. Hearing a pleasant sound of a bird. Enjoying the sound.”

Label what is present as “IS KNOWN”

Another approach to labeling content is saying what is present “is known.” One is not saying what it is known by. This open-ended statement forces one to consider the options. Is it me who knows? Or is it knowing that knows? Adding “is known” to the label points to the other aspect of the knowing of what is known, not just what is known. For example, one would say: “Judging is known. Sadness is known. Throbbing is known.”

Label what is present as “KNOWING”

This may be the most effective way of labelling as it more directly anchors one into the active process of the awarenessing of what is known. The emphasis is on the knowing rather than what is known. One can state: “Knowing (sadness, anger etc.)”

by Dr. Phil Blustein
February 6, 2026

Mahasi Sayadaw was a Burmese Buddhist monk in the late 1800’s who popularized the idea of LABELLING that was a support for Vipassana or Insight meditation. Historically sustained awareness and deep concentration states of Jhana were believed necessary before one attempted insight. Mahasai Sayadaw was more interested in Momentary concentration. The moment to moment awareness of experience without the need for deep concentration to access insight.

This was a technique where one would use one word labels to identify the experience. For example for thinking one would label the experience as thinking, planning, judging, imagining. For physical sensations one would say squeezing, pressure, throbbing, heat. For actions one could say jumping, runnning, hitting. We experience multiple sensations in any moment and it would be impossible to label all of them. Therefore we end up labelling what is dominant in the moment or what we are inclined to be interested in.

Conventionally we automatically subconsciously after contact with a stimulus place a perception on it. There is a knowing that we are seeing an apple, hearing a bird, tasting ice cream, smelling a flower, touching the soft skin of a baby or thinking a thought of anger. The problem of perception is that there may be a knowing of what is present but that does not necessarily mean one knows what they know. Meta-awareness.

In intentionally labeling the experience one is bringing meta-awareness to the moment. It supports continual awareness. This labelling of the continuous flow of experience is indicative of the impermanent nature of what is being experienced. In labelling one has to step back and observe what is present. This is helpful in non-identification with the sense of self. It helps one anchor into the experience as it is and limit the secondary meaning making and selfing.

Putting feelings into words has been shown to help manage negative emotions. Matthew Lieberman using an x-ray of the brain called a functional MRI demonstrated that individuals who labelled their emotions had an increase in the parts of the brain that are important for emotional regulation and planning, while a decrease in areas responsible for fear. Lieberman, M.D. (2007). Putting Feelings Into Words. Psychological Science 2007 Volume 18 Number 5

If you name it you can contain it

Labeling our emotions helps to control them. We are able to self-regulate our reactions more effectively.

I would suggest you experiment with labelling during your meditation. I would invite you to sit up straight and close your eyes. Now bring awareness to whatever arises and label it. As you become comfortable with labelling bring it to your life moment to moment.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
January 16, 2026

I would like to offer a practice that encompasses the totality of the components of mindfulness that includes awareness, an experiential relationship with discernment and compassion resulting in skillful action. Importantly this practice is linked to the breath as a support and symbolic representation of the underlying process. This practice may be more accessible to individuals who have a deeper understanding of their personal conditional nature of self without the need for reflective inquiry. However it may also be of value early in one’s practice as a way of representing and being in relationship with selfing.

SMILE
As soon as the mind starts to criticize and judge instantly SMILE. This is an affirmation of the spontaneous knowing of the underlying process. It is the loving smile of one’s discerning adult or mindfulness for the wounded child that is calling to be heard. It is a smile of compassion and love. The act of smiling has great physiological and emotional benefits. It supports release of feel good neurotransmitters. It reduces stress and improves one’s mood.

INHALATION
The smile is instantly followed by an inhalation. The inhalation reflects a gathering and unification of the created negative energy as a result of the conditioned creation of the sense of self. There is a collection of the dissatisfaction to a central point at the peak of one’s inhalation. It is as if one is extracting the pain from one’s human presence.

EXHALATION
What naturally follows is the exhalation. This beautifully reflects the letting go of one’s attachment to one’s personal story and identification with the sense of self. A letting go of one’s suffering.

STILLNESS
One follows the exhalation to its end. One is resting in the stillness of mindful presence to allow for innate wisdom, compassion and skillful action to arise.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
January 2, 2026

A critical aspect in mindfulness is the capacity to bring awareness to the present moment experience. However it is not just being aware cognitively of what one is experiencing but what is crucial is the capacity to have an embodied presence. To experience what is happening through one’s body to fully appreciate what is present. Too often we touch into what is happening and then quickly move on to the next hit. That is understandable when we are engaged in conversation or a task. However when there is the time it is important to practice mindfulness by allowing oneself to turn towards the experience with acceptance, openness and engagement.

When one senses a sensation it is important to then sustain the awareness of what is being experienced. As one sustains awareness what quickly becomes apparent is the the sensation will change and become less intense. This is very important in recognizing that strong negative emotions such as anger and fear are not fixed and permanent. One needs to surrender to the sensation without resistance. It is valuable to follow the sensation until it dissolves into stillness.

In following this sequence one is able to live life more fully by bringing each moment alive. There is also the capacity for a meditative observation of the impermanence of experience and critically the sense of self that dissolves and in the next instant comes into life similar but different. This supports non-attachment to the sense of self that is the segue to freedom!

by Dr. Phil Blustein
December 5, 2025

“What makes things so? Making them so makes them so.”

Our minds play a key role in how we see reality. We experience the world through our senses of seeing, hearing, tasting, touching, smelling and thinking. Our minds receive the sensation and initially there is a perception of what is sensed that allows one to identify what is present. We can know that what is experienced is an apple, car, person, sun etc.

Next our beliefs, interpretations and history with what is experienced determine its value. Value is not inherent to the experience. It is what we superimpose on it. I like gala apples. Someone else might like delicious apples. This meaning making impacts how one is in relationship with what is experienced. With resistance of desire or aversion or through equanimity of mindfulness.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
November 21, 2025

Meditation has been around for 4000 years! From the Buddhist perspective meditation reflects the Pali word bhavana that stands for cultivation. Cultivation of what? The present moment. What is the present moment? What you choose it to be!

When one hears the word meditation what instantly comes to mind is someone sitting in an upright position with their eyes closed trying to become awakened. Is meditation just focused awareness and concentration. I view meditation as “Mindfulness with Training Wheels.”

Although one is cultivating awareness what inevitably will arise is a distraction such as a thought, emotion or physical sensation. Our mind will inevitably wander and the critical aspect is what do you do with it. How will one be in relationship with the sensation until one returns to the chosen object of attention. It is easy to say just go back to the breath but it is not that simple. Our thoughts are often one of self-criticism and judgment. We identify with the sense of self that we believe is having the thought and is responsible for what we perceive as happening. We claim ownership for the awareness that knows what is being experienced.

Concentration Meditation involves focused awareness and inevitably insight into what one is experiencing as the mind wanders. Mindfulness at its core consists of these two components of meta-awareness, to know what you know, and insight, discernment into the true nature of reality.

The great value in a formal sitting practice of meditation is that it allows one to practice mindfulness in a controlled setting. We have the time and privacy to practice mindfulness with what our minds are creating without distraction. We are creating the foundation to practice mindfulness in our lived life as it is in real time moment to moment once we get off the cushion.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
November 7, 2025

*SET THE INTENTION
Meditation initially is about enhanced awareness. Before the start of the practice one might state: “May I have applied and sustained awareness of the present moment.”

*SHUT the EYES
One can meditate with eyes open or closed. I would suggest shutting the eyes in order to limit distracting visual stimulation.

*SPINE
One’s body position is critical. An upright but not uptight spine is key. It is as if one is being lifted up from the top of the head. The shoulders fall back and the chest expands. The lower spine tilts forward. The legs are flat on the floor, not crossed. The buttocks are higher than the knees. If one is short one may need a pillow under one’s feet. If one is tall pillows may be necessary under one’s buttocks. One may sit towards the front of the chair. One’s back is away from the back of the chair in order to create effort in maintaining one’s position. The hands can rest on the thighs with palms facing down. The hands can also rest in the lap with the right hand palm up on the lap with the left hand palm up over the right hand. The thumbs touch above the hand.

*SOMATIC SENSATIONS
One then brings attention to the body. One can perform a quick Body Scan starting from the feet and rising up the body to the head. If there is any tension then rest at that spot and breathe into it until it relaxes. Following the scan one can bring attention to the sensations of the feet on the floor or the feel of the buttocks on the chair. One is trying to appreciate the groundedness and stability of the body. It is critical to realize that a still body leads to a still mind.

*SPOT
Next bring attention to where you feel the breath. One can feel this at the tip of the nostrils, chest, abdomen or body. It may be helpful to feel the breath at the tip of the nostrils as it is a very sensitive focal spot to bring one’s attention to. It is important to breathe in through the nose as it allows for greater humidification and purification of the breath and greater lung expansion supporting the relaxation phase. Focusing one’s attention at the tip of the nostrils helps to support breathing in through one’s nose.

*SENSATIONS OF THE BREATH
One is bringing attention to the physical sensations of the movement of the breath. Although we are bringing attention to one object, it is constantly changing. The breath can be soft or rough, quiet or loud, dry or wet, warm or cool, regular or irregular, short or long. Focusing on the unique qualities of the breath helps to support interest and sustained attention.

*SEGMENTS
The breath is not just one cycle. If one examines the breath carefully one will notice that there is an inhalation followed by a short pause. This is followed by a longer exhalation and pause. It will be easier to follow the breath as segments rather than one complete cycle. One can follow the inhalation and pause as one segment followed by the exhalation and pause as another segment. Another way is to bring attention to each of the 4 segments

*STILLNESS
One of the reasons we lose focused awareness of the breath is that when we get to the longer pause segment at the end of exhalation we lose interest. We need to bring intentional attention to the stillness and silence at this longer pause. Stillness is not nothingness. Mindfulness with its focused awareness has an “Observer Effect.” It will change what we are observing and sustain our interest. The end pause will become more prolonged and spacious. This will result in a more activated subsequent inhalation.

*SPONTANEOUS
One is not trying to deliberately control the breath. It is simply allowing for the spontaneous movement of the breath and being moved by that.

*SWITCH
It is impossible to have sustained attention to the breath without physical sensations, thoughts and emotions arising to distract one. Mind wandering with a switch in the object of our attention is inevitable. This is not a failure. Meta-awareness that one has been distracted from the breath is a critical part of meditation. However what is critical is how one is in relationship with the distraction. Mindfulness involves meta-awareness and insight. In understanding the true nature of reality and the sense of self one has the potential of holding all experience without resistance and self-identification.

*SUPPORT
One can support sustained awareness of the breath by labeling the breath “In” with the inhalation and pause followed by “Out” for the subsequent exhalation and pause. Counting can also support our attention. One can count 1 with the first inhalation followed by 2 with the exhalation. The next inhalation is 3 followed by 4 with the exhalation. This is carried on to 10 and then one starts again.

Following the S’s of meditation may help your AIM TO SUSTAIN.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
October 16, 2025

*self
We conventionally operate from the perspective of being the sense of self. We believe we are this constant solid and real entity. This is fraught with constant self-judgment and criticism of our actions and thoughts. We believe we are flawed and inadequate and are constantly employing childhood defensive strategies to feel safe, loved and worthy. Our Western society would have us believe that our goal is to try and develop a stronger sense of self so that we can be happy and have less suffering. We are often caught by and pursue societal goals.

*Not-self
With mindful awareness and insight we begin to appreciate that the sense of self is a temporary ephemeral conditioned construct that arises moment to moment. We have a belief system of who our sense of self is and should act. This is significantly influenced by our core woundings that is based on how we felt as children we needed to be in order to feel safe, loved and worthy in relationship with our parents. Every moment is a self-referential judgment of our actions. Has our sense of self acted in a congruent or incongruent way with our belief system. If not then our inner voice is one of self-criticism and judgment. We develop a personal and unique defensive coping and survival strategy as children to exist. With this awareness of the foundation for the sense of self we slowly can be present with our wounding. Mindfulness holds our fear with acceptance and compassion allowing for its progressive deconstruction. There is a slow integration and healing of our woundings. We recognize that a sense of self is being created moment to moment but are able to be in relationship with it without owning it. We progressively recognize that there is a self that has been constructed but it is not who we are. We are able to dis-identify with the sense of self.

*No self
As we transcend the conditioned nature of self we spontaneously enter into a space of mindful presence. As there is no sense of self to protect we are able to experience the interconnectedness and interdependence of all existence. We rest in a mindful awareness that manifests innate compassion and wisdom.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
October 3, 2025

You can dramatically extend life – not by multiplying the number of your years

But by expanding the fullness of your moments

by Shinzen Young
The Science of Enlightenment

It is through our meditation that there is the capacity to observe the selfing process and make valuable insights into the true nature of self.

When the sense of self arises ask yourself: “Was there the same sense of self that existed before my awareness of the present moment self?”

Next, if one deliberately follows what happens to the sense of self one will observe that it will inevitably come to an end and extinguish. Impermanence!

What happens next? A new sense of self will arise. The question is: “Is the new sense of self the same or different than what already existed?”

These questions will reveal that although a new sense of self arises that may be similar, it is always somewhat different than what existed before.

It clearly points out how the self becomes newly created and extinguishes moment to moment to be replaced by a different form of the self. It brings insight to the selfing process through an experiential observation of the fabricated and impermanent nature of self.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
September 5, 2025

“There are only two tragedies in life.
One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”
– Oscar Wilde

This speaks to the Buddhist understanding that preferences and clinging to them lead to our suffering. We are always in relationship with experience either through desire or aversion. We want something we don’t have or want to keep what we have. We don’t want something we have or don’t want something that we don’t have. Either way this resistance with the way things are will cause dissatisfaction. The ultimate segue to freedom is the capacity to be present with equanimity with what we experience. To be present with a balanced perspective no matter what we encounter.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
August 25, 2025

Freedom is not believing what I think you think about me

Freedom is not believing what I think about me

by Dr. Phil Blustein
June 6, 2025

We create our suffering by interpreting every moment
From what we believe we need to be
Rather than allowing one to selflessly be

by Dr. Phil Blustein
May 16, 2025

self is Just One’s Way to
Cope with the FEAR of being Human

by Dr. Phil Blustein
May 2, 2025

Each moment is an opportunity to experience who you believe you are
And an opening to discover who you really are

by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 18, 2025

We create a sense of self moment to moment as a defensive reactive action to meet unmet psychological needs in order to feel safe, loved and worthy. Typically we rest in identification with the sense of self. Self appropriates awareness and not only are we the object that is known, self, but the subject that knows what is known, self.

As we begin to learn about mindfulness and develop intentional discernment into this process of selfing there is a progressive deconstruction and disentanglement with the sense of self. This discernment can be supported by a repetitive reflective practice that explores how inner child wounding is the basis for self formation.

As there is a progression from our basic functioning mind to a more discerning one that is able to see the true nature of the sense of self, the belief in self weakens and there is a reciprocal strengthening of mindful awareness independent of identification with self. As we let go of the sense of the self there is a natural default into selfless awarenessing.

Conventional awareness does not have the discerning qualities to it that allows it to examine self and see its true nature. This is an awareness that immediately leads into selfing.

This shift in focus rests primarily in the deconstruction of the sense of self rather than a primary strengthening of awareness. Mindful discernment leading to non-identification with the sense of self is the intermediary that allows for the movement from selfing to awarenessing.

There is a dynamic dance between selfing and awarenessing dependent on the strength of the self story in the moment. This is a seesaw effect. Specifically, as the selfing increases, knowing decreases. As selfing decreases knowing can increase.

The sense of self as the object shifts from the belief that it is true and enduring to a hybrid understanding of it being real and its conditioned created nature to ultimately knowing it is just an illusion. Awarenessing as the subject shifts from being co-opted by self to a hybrid understanding of self-appropriated awareness and awarenessing to ultimately resting in non-self-referential mindful awareness.

This relationship is like a rubber band. Its tension will be dependent on the respective strengths of these opposing forces pulling the band. Through its action mindfulness is converting self from Velcro to Teflon.

Moment to moment there may be an oscillation between self and mindful awareness. Where we land on this continuum is constantly shifting. There is a progressive shift from a self oriented existence to resting in the witnessing perspective of unconditioned presence. With progressive practice the insight into the fabricated illusory nature of self is spontaneous and we automatically rest in awarenessing.

Ultimately in mindful awareness there is just non-identification with the sense of self that leads to selfless knowing of experience. The sense of self that is having the experience and the sense of self that is witnessing what is happening dissolves. Just like the transition from ego to the discerning mind to no self there is movement from self-appropriated awareness to discerning awareness to non-self-referential mindful awareness. Trust the intuitive wisdom and compassion of awarenessing to act skillfully.

One can approach resting in awarenessing in two ways. The object oriented approach is focused on seeing the illusory nature of self in order to let go and dis-identify and open into awarenessing. The subject oriented focus is to learn how to primarily anchor in awarenessing and be the knowing quality of mind. The more direct and probably easier approach is to start with deconstructing and disentangling from one’s sense of self. The only concern in approaching experience directly and primarily from awarenessing is that there may be spiritual bypassing of one’s fundamental inner child wounding.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 4, 2025

Is having a sense of self a bad thing? Can it exist? I am here typing and it seems that there is an entity that is doing that, that is me! When people talk about no self or not self in contemplative practice it can be confusing and may immediatey create resistance and fear as it implies a denial of existence. Who would I be without my sense of self? I am the self that I believe is me.

The core problem is that if we identify with our conventional understanding of the sense of self we will inevitably suffer! Our sense of self that is created is based on compensating for the deficiencies of our inner child. We are owning a self that is inherently flawed. We are acting to defend our sense of self that is viewed as being inadequate in every moment. One can see that the present moment self is a product of a constant flow of psychophysical processing and is not a permanent enduring structure. Therefore it makes no sense to be what is a continual temporary, different and ephemeral creation. The conventional self does serve a useful utilitarian function of being a symbolic representation for this human presence who we believe we are. Is the belief system that self is based on true and accurate? Is the interpretation of the present moment action of self true and accurate? Don’t forget the belief system of who we believe our sense of self is, was formed when we were very young and our perceptions were based on just trying to feel safe, loved and worthy. The way we see the world as adults is vastly different that when we were children. Presently we have knowledge, wisdom, experience, discernment and power.

I would like to suggest an alternate way to view a sense of self from our conventional understanding of it being an interpretation of self-referential judgment that has no enduring qualities. We come into this world with a unique personal DNA code that determines our physicality, certain mental functions and predispositions that shape our personality. We all have a basic biologic drive for survival and procreation. Superimposed on this innate basis is our childhood conditioning and other traumas that are unique to who we are. The traumatic events that happened to us were real. Our understanding of them not so. They were based on arbitrary, inaccurate, incomplete and everchanging misperceived interpretations.

We come into this world as humans with this wonderful capacity to be sentient beings. To see, hear, taste, touch and smell. The capacity to think, create and discern. The ability to feel our emotions. The capacity to inhabit these bodies and experience life through the direct felt sense of our physical sensations. There is nothing incomplete and imperfect about this. Just a wonderful potential of expression of our humaness. We come into this world with a unique gift that lives through us such as an artistic, dramatic, athletic, scholary or caregiver passion. There is no question that our DNA code is modifiable and changes as well as our physicality, mental and emotional functioning over time. However, I believe these elements can claim to have a certain degree of constancy and connection to them. It may not completely fulfill the Buddhist understanding of impermanence but it serves a valuable function to allow ourselves to get around the notion of not having a self. We can claim to have an underlying core that is unique and not constructed moment to moment. Just because you keep painting your house does not change the fact that the house still remains intact and the same underneathe. Just because you put on a different coat of identity does not change what is present underneathe. I see it like a ball of wool that slowly unravels. There is a connection between each new thread of wool that is unique but it all arises from the same common origin. There is a progressive linkage that unites everything.

Contemplative practice would say that we believe we are the sense of self that is created moment to moment from causes and conditions coming together. That it is a fabricated construction with no inherent essence. That is true but what creates the fabrication is separate and has a different truth than the self that is created. Can we shift what we believe our sense of self is? Can we see ourselves as this human presence that is a manifestation of all these unique and wonderful characteristics described above. That we are this self that is our human presence that has the capacity to be in relationship with the present moment based on our unique potentiality, not our constructed conditioned interpretation.

self as the creator of what we manifest, not what is the product of the creation

self as the underlying process of what manifests, not what is processed

This is the sense of self that we are at our core, not our constructed conditioned nature. These are constant human capacities that allow us to be in relationship with experience, not what results from the interaction.

Although a sense of self is created that is conditioned let us not forget that the intentionality of whatever our minds create is skillful. It is an attempt to protect our human being and keep us safe, loved and worthy. The self may be a conflicted and troublesome creation but its purpose is intended to be skillful.

The problem is not that there is a sense of self but what it represents. Can we change our perspective of self and see it as innately complete, whole and integrated as it can be in the moment, not flawed and inadequate? Ultimately one can be present in each moment without worrying about having to defend the sense of self. This allows one to act in a skillful way that recognizes the interdependence and interconnection with all existence. Wouldn’t it be liberating if we could live our life from this base of an integrated stable presence rather than our moment to moment fluctuating interpreted sense of self? To observe each moment, not how it defines who we believe we are, but how it reflects how we are in a skillful relationship with each moment. Can I see self as this physicality, cognitive and emotional complete presence and the potentiality to process and the processing of experience moment to moment, not what is processed.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 21, 2025

The contemporary understanding of mindfulness is reflected in Jon Kabat-Zinn’s definition:

Paying attention, in a particular way, on purpose, in the present moment, nonjudgmentally

Being non-judgmental is important but it is only one step in a broader practice that involves several key components. I believe that using the word non-judgmental as a key part of the definition misdirects and confuses people along the path. The emphasis needs to be redirected. Mindfulness is not a non-reactive and non-judgmental position but involves an open and receptive presence with discernment into the true nature of self in order to be present in a wholesome way.

The word non-judgmental refers to a state. This is the way I will be with experience. I believe mindfulness is a MULTIFACETED PROCESS of how one is in relationship with what is known and responds to it. The overarching map of mindfulness involves the three components of awareness, relationship and action.

I would like to offer my definition for mindfulness.

META-AWARENESS
ENGAGED EMBODIMENT
DISCERNMENT OF SELF-REFERENTIAL JUDGMENT
NON-ATTACHMENT WITH SELF
SKILLFUL ACTION

*AWARENESS

The original explanation of sati was to bring a sustained awareness to what is present in order to examine and learn from it. In holding what is present this allows for the possibility of discernment to understand how the present moment experience and self has come into existence. 

One constantly hears that modern mindfulness is to:

Know what one’s experience is in the present moment

To know means to be aware of one’s experience. This definitely is part of the definition of mindfulness. There is no question that awareness is an essential first step to mindfulness. If we don’t know what is happening how can we know what to do with it. The problem is that too often we are lost in thought and don’t know what we know. There needs to be meta-awareness or knowing what one knows.

Furthermore, the understanding of awareness in mindfulness is that there is a sustained knowing of what is known. As Andrew Olendzki explains in Tricycle Magazine Fall 2014 The Mindfulness Wedge:

“The ability to hold awareness upon a chosen object with some stability or to return it to a primary object once it has strayed, and to do so without agitation, self-blame, or frustration, is a useful skill to learn.“

Bear in mind if you are aware of your sadness, guilt, shame and anger you may actually be MORE sad, guilty, shameful and angry. You are suddenly aware of what you are feeling while previously you were lost in the emotion and did not know what you knew. The problem is that modern definitions that limit mindfulness to enhanced attention does not do justice to what it really is. It is not just the: “Joy of Being in the Now.” What are we aware of? The initial sensation, the meaning making and one’s relationship with what is present or the action that follows?

*RELATIONSHIP

Mindfulness is not just about awareness! It is about developing a wholesome relationship with the present moment.

The initial aspect is RECEPTIVITY. Non-judgment has an implied quality of containment and separation. Mindfulness is an invitation, opening, allowing and intimately experiencing what is present without resistance. One begins to befriend the mind! This is not about inhibiting one’s normal reaction of judgment. If judgment occurs then it is just part of what one is intimately experiencing. This is achieved by directly feeling what is known through the body. Mindfulness is not just about the thinking mind but also importantly involves processing one’s experience through the body to feel one’s way through suffering.

Mindfulness is not only about being in the now

But being ok with whatever is now

Mindfulness is also about DISCERNMENT, not non-judgment. Judgment is a critical evaluation of what is present influenced by personal bias and the need to be better than someone else. Discernment is a clear seeing into how our sense of self and present moment reality comes into existence through self-referential judgment. It is an insight practice that brings clarity to the moment, not a judging process.This allows one to be with what is as it is not what we make, want, believe or need it to be. This insight allows for non-identification with the sense of self that is critical for not suffering.

Can you be one with it

Not the one that is it

*ACTION

It is through non-identification with the sense of self one is able to be open to the interconnectedness and interdependence with other allowing one to act skillfully. There is no reified sense of self to defend. Mindfulness is always associated with wholesome action.

One can see that being non-judgmental is in fact not an important component of mindfulness. It is not about what one does not do, not judge, but what one does do, awareness, embodiment, discernment and skillful action.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 7, 2025

Historic mindfulness was much more than the contemporary understanding of mindfulness as awareness and being non-judgmental.

There was a REFRAIN after each of the mindfulness practices that indicated one contemplates the body (feelings, mind and dhammas):

* Contemplating experience both INTERNALLY and EXTERNALLY. One contemplates one’s own and then another’s experience.
* Observing the IMPERMANENCE of existence.
* Consciousness of what is present to the extent needed for BARE KNOWLEDGE with SUSTAINED MINDFULNESS such that one is aware of what is present as it is without mental proliferation and selfing.
* ABIDE INDEPENDENT or with NO CLINGING to anything.

Significantly the refrain is pointing to understanding the impermanence of experience and the importance of non-clinging as the segue to freedom.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
February 21, 2025

The Buddha described right or appropriate mindfulness. It consisted of the following qualities:

“And what, monks, is right mindfulness? Here, a monk dwells contemplating the body in the body, ardent, clearly comprehending, mindful, having removed covetousness and displeasure in regard to the world. He dwells contemplating feelings in feelings . . . contemplating mind in mind . . . contemplating phenomena in phenomena, ardent, clearly comprehending, mindful, having removed covetousness and displeasure in regard to the world. This is called right mindfulness.”

One dwells contemplating body in the body, feelings in feelings, mind in mind and phenomena in phenomena. One brings awareness to and experiences sensations as a sensation without selfing.

One is ardent or committed, passionate, curious and energized in the process.

What is critical is the element of clearly comprehending or clearly seeing that addresses the understanding of the essence of existence. Impermanence, dissatisfaction and not-self. The sense of self is an impermanent structure that is fabricated.

There is an initial sustained observation of the designated sense object in order to allow one to bring to mind the teachings of the Buddha. It allowed for discernment. Is what is present skillful or not and how does one respond in a skillful way? In understanding the impermanent nature of self there is no identification with it.

Mindful or the ability to have sustained awareness of the present moment to allow one to examine and learn from the present moment.

One wants to act to remove covetousness and displeasure ie. inhibit clinging. To eliminate the preferences of desire and aversion that is the segue to awakening.

Mindfulness is a lot more than awareness and being non-judgmental. Following awareness what is cultivated is a skillful relationship with the present moment and subsequent wholesome action guided by the discernment and resultant insight that reality and the sense of self are conditioned constructs that are fabricated. With this understanding there is no need to identify with the sense of self. One can move beyond the limiting constraints of one’s personal narrative that defines one’s sense of self and be present from mindful presence that is a spaciousness of innate compassion and wisdom.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
February 7, 2025

The contemporary definition of mindfulness is: Awareness of the present moment, on purpose, in a particular way, non-judgmentally.

The word non-judgmental that is a dominant part of the definition refers to a state. This is the way I will be with experience. I believe mindfulness is a MULTIFACETED PROCESS of how one is present with what is known and responds to it.

The overarching map of mindfulness involves three components.

* AWARENESS: Awareness of what is present.
* RELATIONSHIP: How to develop a wholesome relationship with the present moment by directly experiencing what is known without resistance through insight into selfing.
* ACTION: How to act skillfully through non-identification with the sense of self.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
January 16, 2025

Microdosing of the breath can be an effective tool to increase awareness and decrease background mental and somatic hyperarousal, mind wandering and reactivity to what is known.

As often as you can, bring intentional awareness to the breath and follow it as long and sustained as you can. The breath is important in supporting the relaxation response of the autonomic nervous system.

One can “microdose breathing” by remembering to intentionally breathe with a prolonged exhalation relative to the inhalation and slow breathing with 4 to 6 breaths a minute as often as you can remember throughout the day.

This form of breathing can be in the background as one performs another activity such as walking, eating, reading, waiting in line, driving etc. It can also be a standalone practice in the moment when one does not need to actively engage with other or in a task.

One can use cues such as post-it-notes, apps or timers on your phone or physical links such as before you eat, walk, go to the bathroom, answer your phone or before posting an email to remind oneself to bring awareness to the breath.

These short bursts of controlled breathing are a great way to support a greater predisposition to be in a resting state of a stabilized nervous system and a decreased tendency for emotional and cognitive hyperarousal and reactivity.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
January 3, 2025

I strive for the meaning of life and live with this existential need to know. I believe it may reflect relationships, play and a sense of purpose. But do these elements just mean having a meaningful life?

Could it be experiencing the non-self-referential conditioned nature of existence?

Why do I need to know? If I have an answer I have a feeling that this will bring some certainty to my existence. Knowing will give me some comfort as there is safety. I have a path. I know what I need to do. I know what to expect. I believe I know who I am.

However, what if there is no answer to this big question. Maybe this is something that I can’t comprehend at this moment. I have not evolved enough. It is bigger than I can understand.

Maybe the path is to keep asking the questions and allow discoveries to reveal themselves rather than thinking I can think my way to the answer.

Perhaps it is not having to cognitively know what each moment is about but experientiality living it.

Perhaps I need patience to allow experience to be the way it is meant to be rather than the way I need it to be.

Perhaps it is just being open to whatever arises.

Perhaps it is recognizing that we don’t have control over what happens.

Perhaps the only thing I can be sure of is the certainty of uncertainty.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
December 6, 2024

I said something to a friend that I felt was inappropriate. I instantly began to criticize and judge myself. To what end. The reality is what has happened, has happened. It cannot be changed. It is what it is.

The truth is that most of what happens occurs from a subconscious automatic and autonomous drive by our minds to keep our inner child safe, loved and worthy. We may interpret what we did as not being appropriate but from a PERSONAL perspective all our thoughts, speech and actions have a skillful intention. For the most part we are not aware of what we are going to do before we do it! Free will is a myth. Conventionally we can only be aware of what has happened after it has happened. Unless we develop mindfulness there is no awareness of the intentionality of our actions before we act.

In the end, all one can do is be responsible for what one does with what one knows. If I have acted inappropriately with my friend and am aware of it only then can I take ownership and act accordingly. Also, what can I learn from what has happened that will help me going forward? I need to reflect on the intentionality of my speech before I speak.

This is not a free get out of jail card. It is simply explaining the underlying process for our speech and actions. Hopefully it will allow one to let go of self-blame and judgment and do what is just skillfully needed.

Don’t beat yourself up for what you did but just take responsibility for how you will skillfully respond to what has happened! Be kind to yourself. The essence of mindfulness is not so much what is present but how are you in relationship with it.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
November 22, 2024

I made a comment the other day to a friend and I felt it was inappropriate. My mind was upset and immediately judged me at the time. It said: “How could I have said that? It was so mean. I am such a bad friend. This is terrible. I am terrible!” In the moment all I was aware of was the self-criticism and not what actually happened. The next day all of a sudden my mind is saying: “This is terrible. How could I have done that.” My mind was reliving the previous experience. However, there was no context for what my mind was saying. There was no recollection of my previous initial conversation with my friend, just the judgment of what I had done.

This is the common way in which we operate. We forget what the initiating event was that led to the judgment. We are predominantly aware of the resistance, approach or avoidance, to the judgment of what has happened rather than what incited the reaction.

Is it possible to bring awareness to what started the process and is this of value? Yes. We have the capacity to develop interest, curiosity and resolve to specifically look for what was the starting experience. One can train the mind to slow down, search and identify the initial stimulus to the judgment. With practice and over time this starts to begin a more automatic response.

At the point one becomes aware of the self-criticism immediately stop and look to see if one can identify what the mind was initially thinking about that triggered the reaction. In identifying the original stimulus and seeing what we create with it we are able to clearly see the process of how we create our reality and sense of self. This helps support non-identification.

It is much easier to be in relationship with the original experience that is neutral in itself prior to the meaning making and selfing. Stepping back to the contact point creates a pause, inhibits mental proliferation and allows a space for intentional focusing on the underlying belief system of our sense of self, that is the basis for self-referential judgment and selfing.

As we know our mind is a meaning making machine. If we can identify the original event before meaning making we have the capacity to rest in that moment and change our reaction to it!

It is important to return to the original point of contact. It is important to look backwards in order to move forwards.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
November 8, 2024