meditation

*self
We conventionally operate from the perspective of being the sense of self. We believe we are this constant solid and real entity. This is fraught with constant self-judgment and criticism of our actions and thoughts. We believe we are flawed and inadequate and are constantly employing childhood defensive strategies to feel safe, loved and worthy. Our Western society would have us believe that our goal is to try and develop a stronger sense of self so that we can be happy and have less suffering. We are often caught by and pursue societal goals.

*Not-self
With mindful awareness and insight we begin to appreciate that the sense of self is a temporary ephemeral conditioned construct that arises moment to moment. We have a belief system of who our sense of self is and should act. This is significantly influenced by our core woundings that is based on how we felt as children we needed to be in order to feel safe, loved and worthy in relationship with our parents. Every moment is a self-referential judgment of our actions. Has our sense of self acted in a congruent or incongruent way with our belief system. If not then our inner voice is one of self-criticism and judgment. We develop a personal and unique defensive coping and survival strategy as children to exist. With this awareness of the foundation for the sense of self we slowly can be present with our wounding. Mindfulness holds our fear with acceptance and compassion allowing for its progressive deconstruction. There is a slow integration and healing of our woundings. We recognize that a sense of self is being created moment to moment but are able to be in relationship with it without owning it. We progressively recognize that there is a self that has been constructed but it is not who we are. We are able to dis-identify with the sense of self.

*No self
As we transcend the conditioned nature of self we spontaneously enter into a space of mindful presence. As there is no sense of self to protect we are able to experience the interconnectedness and interdependence of all existence. We rest in a mindful awareness that manifests innate compassion and wisdom.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
October 3, 2025

You can dramatically extend life – not by multiplying the number of your years

But by expanding the fullness of your moments

by Shinzen Young
The Science of Enlightenment

It is through our meditation that there is the capacity to observe the selfing process and make valuable insights into the true nature of self.

When the sense of self arises ask yourself: “Was there the same sense of self that existed before my awareness of the present moment self?”

Next, if one deliberately follows what happens to the sense of self one will observe that it will inevitably come to an end and extinguish. Impermanence!

What happens next? A new sense of self will arise. The question is: “Is the new sense of self the same or different than what already existed?”

These questions will reveal that although a new sense of self arises that may be similar, it is always somewhat different than what existed before.

It clearly points out how the self becomes newly created and extinguishes moment to moment to be replaced by a different form of the self. It brings insight to the selfing process through an experiential observation of the fabricated and impermanent nature of self.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
September 5, 2025

“There are only two tragedies in life.
One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”
– Oscar Wilde

This speaks to the Buddhist understanding that preferences and clinging to them lead to our suffering. We are always in relationship with experience either through desire or aversion. We want something we don’t have or want to keep what we have. We don’t want something we have or don’t want something that we don’t have. Either way this resistance with the way things are will cause dissatisfaction. The ultimate segue to freedom is the capacity to be present with equanimity with what we experience. To be present with a balanced perspective no matter what we encounter.

by Dr. Phil Blustein
August 25, 2025

Freedom is not believing what I think you think about me

Freedom is not believing what I think about me

by Dr. Phil Blustein
June 6, 2025