Conventionally I see it as:
We become what we have chosen to do with what has happened to us.
Suffering is not from what has happened but what we do with it! There is an automatic subconscious interpretation of experience based on the need to meet unmet psychological needs that define our sense of self. This results in a creation of a self appropriate for the moment that dictates our action.
by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 17, 2026
by Dr. Phil Blustein
April 3, 2026
by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 20, 2026
We have the opportunity to see the value in each moment, rather than its negativity.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the magic of our HUMAN PROCESSING MIND that is able to create meaning and our reality in every experience.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate and learn about one’s CONDITIONED HISTORY that determines selfing.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the INTENTIONALITY and VALUE of how every created thought and feeling is an attempt to keep us safe, loved and worthy.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate what one can learn to EVOLVE along this contemplative path from our storied self to mindful presence.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the magic and mystery of being HUMAN as a sentient being.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate one’s innate GIFTS AND PASSIONS.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate feeling INTERCONNECTED and INTERDEPENDENT with everything.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the inevitability of DEATH to teach us to live each moment to its fullest.
Each moment is an OPPORTUNITY to appreciate the CHOICE one has in how you can act to be in a SKILLFUL relationship with what is present.
We need to intentionally reflect as often as we can, not whether the experience is good or bad in a judgmental sense but learn to recognize and appreciate the value in whatever is present. We need to change the lens through which we LOOK TO SEE. We create a predetermined way to look at experience every moment so that we see it as valuable, supportive, nourishing and enabling. In seeing the value in every moment we are less likely to be judgmental, be in resistance and act unskillfuly in reaction to it.
This is an intentionality that we need to start our day with and repeat as often as we can.
by Dr. Phil Blustein
March 6, 2026
Conventionally when we talk about ourselves it is from the first person perspective. It is from our personal point of view. We use “I, me, my, mine, we and our.” One can also describe what is happening from the third person perspective. In this scenario one is relinquishing ownership of the story to a witnessing perspective. One uses words such as “He, she, it, they, his, hers them or one’s name.” Using the third person perspective is an effective way to objectify the sense of self and support non-identification. What one is doing is stepping back and describing what is happening to this “person” that appears separate from you.
I lose my keys and am very angry. Conventionally my mind says: “I am so stupid and careless to have lost my keys. This is terrible. What will I do.” Describing it from the third person perspective I would say: “Philip lost his keys and now is feeling worried and upset.”
This initially feels quite strange to talk about yourself like this. Normally when we use someone’s first name we are talking about someone else.
Ethan Kross demonstrated that third person self-talk helped to facilitate self-control. Kross, E. Third-person self-talk facilitates emotion regulation without engaging cognitive control: Converging evidence from ERP and fMRI (2017). Scientific Reports Volume 7, Article number: 4519
It is a very simple effective technique using language to support mindfulness.
by Dr. Phil Blustein
February 20, 2026